SmackDown airs tonight with a live show emanating from Scotiabank Arena in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. This is the third episode of SmackDown during the nine week build to Money in the Bank, which takes place on October 10.
Kevin Owens is too fat to win the WWE championship
Tonight’s SmackDown features a huge main event where Kevin Owens challenges CM Punk for the WWE championship. The match takes place in Toronto, so KO will presumably be a big fan favorite and CM will be heavily booed when the bell rings.
Owens hates Punk going back 20 years ago when CM was a giant dickhead who ran him down in front of the Ring of Honor locker room. KO has since watched Punk continue to be a phony, miserable piece of shit throughout his entire wrestling career, so nothing would be sweeter than winning his first WWE championship at Punk’s expense. What’s even better is that Kevin’s mom and family will be in attendance to watch him repeatedly punch Phil in the face and take his title.
The only problem with Kevin’s plan, of course, is that CM is in incredible shape and seems to think KO is too much of a lazy, fat slob to beat him for the belt. After they went back and forth on the mic last week while not naming KO’s loser AEW friends, CM made fun of Kevin’s big belly by calling him “Endometriosis,” before saying he’s going to put his fat ass to sleep when they fight for the first time ever.
Can Kevin Owens win the WWE championship in his first televised match since his surprise return at SummerSlam, or is he just too fat to keep up with old man CM Punk? Tune into SmackDown to find out.
The rest of the card
“The Glamour” Blake Monroe finally has her debut match on the main roster tonight when she goes one-on-one with Giulia. Blake was “coming soon” to SmackDown for nearly two months, and it’s been almost another two months waiting for her to actually wrestle. Will the wait be worth it when she faces her former Stardom rival, who was damn near squashed by Lash Legend the last time she wrestled on SmackDown?
Tama and Talla Tonga are the new WWE tag team champions now that Haku is their manager. They are putting the titles on the line tonight against former champions Damian Priest and R-Truth. Assuming the Tongans retain, will Shinsuke Nakamura and his mystery friend from Japan show up afterwards to kick off a new war against MFT?
Cody Rhodes and Randy Orton are also scheduled to appear on SmackDown, although we don’t know exactly what they’ll be doing just yet. Orton showed up outta nowhere last week to attack Rhodes moments before he was supposed to wrestle Sami Zayn, which incited a wild brawl. Will one of these men get to finish the job tonight by smashing the other’s head in into the steel steps with a steel chair? What kind of extremely violent stipulation will be added to their match at Sunday Night’s Main Event?
Other stuff to keep an eye on
– Chelsea Green might be a made woman in WWE thanks to last week’s promo where she convinced GM Nick Aldis to give her more time to figure out a solution before he strips her of the interim WWE women’s championship due to a broken orbital bone. Has Chelsea found the right protective face mask that she can wrestle in to defend her belt? Will Nia Jax try to crush her face with a massive leg drop before that happens?
– It looks like Finn Balor and GUNTHER will square off soon to determine the next top contender to the WWE championship. But how will Sami Zayn react after he was screwed out of that spot when his match with Cody Rhodes never happened?
– Jacy Jayne is the new women’s United States champion after beating Tiffany Stratton last week. Is Tiffy Time coming for an immediate rematch?
– Paige tried to respond to Nikki Bella’s heel turn explanation last week, but her segment was cut from the show. Are Nikki and Paige ready to continue their beef on social media if WWE keeps cutting their segments from SmackDown?
– Is Tatum Paxley ready for her debut match on the main roster after recently showing up with Alexa Bliss to help Charlotte Flair beat Jade Cargill and the Baddies? And what’s up with Tatum’s disturbing obsession with Flair?
– Trick Williams is coming back for more after already losing twice against United States Champion Baron Corbin. Will they be booked in another title match at Sunday Night’s Main Event so that Trick can do the job a third time for the very tall champ? Does Carmelo Hayes have anything to say after Corbin beat his ass in a title match last week?
– Where the f*** is Jordynne Grace and Ilja Dragunov?
What will you be looking for on SmackDown?
